Lock me up, no can go out. China boss
man, he, bring doctor. Doctor, he come. … Chinese doctor he come take baby out
but doctor he say too late. No can take baby out.
Rickie born, China boss man, he say … give baby away!
No, I say. I say me love him. I say kill
me. … I say give away, I kill me, I kill someone.
No make me give Rickie away. They put me, Rickie in little room, little room. …. They have 6 little room. …… 6 girl. We Pinay girl, except Burma girl. …..
They love Rickie but if Rickie cry, boss man, he get angry, yell shut up."
She stuttered and stopped. Stunned I reached over and hugged her, openly crying.
"Mom ….. please,….., please Mom, ….., let it out. Let me help carry what they did to you …. oh God Mom I love you!"
My words too were between sobs.
“Chinese lady … she live in front room building. She keep see us. We no go out. Man he come ….. come in shop door. …… door tinkle when he open door … door little bell, tinkle when open ….. We know man come, hear tinkle bell, man come see girl. China, lady, she talk, man, white man only, ……, army, navy, some not army, navy.
Man, he give, give 5. ……. He give money, he give $5 to China lady.
Then, then she call us. She, she have little bell too, she ring her little bell. …. We hear bell, go in front, we stand so man can look see us. We wear sarong ……. sandals, no wear more. In front, sarong, we wear down ….. down so man can look see dede. He look, see …. He look see girl he like. … He tell China boss lady, girl he like. Girl he no like, they go back little room. Girl he like, she take to her room, on bed …. he sex her.
Burma girl tall ….. men look see, like her. They like me too …. Me young, look, see me …… me dede big with milk for Rickie.
In room, I have dresser in my room. …. I take drawer out, hide Rickie in drawer, on floor, cover with cloth, not want Rickie see me bad even if baby. ….. Man, some drunk, some no nice, some nice, sex me ….. some, …, after sex me, give dollar, some less, …..., I give some give money to boss lady.
Boss lady, she say, man, he give you money? Take away money if she find man give money. I give some boss, hide some.
They look, hide money. No find. I hide good, hide inside, Virgin Mary.
Me not happy but have Rickie. Feed Rickie okay, feed me good. Food …. food it ... good. All rice we want, pork, poi. Want us eat. We eat all want, want we big, like Hawaii girl. "
"How many Mom? How many men came at
"No, not night only, sometime day. Sometime no men…… sometime 5, ….. sometime, …... more if big ship come.